I wish I could come up with a catchy title, but it just isn't going to happen.

Akira Kurosawa. I'm kind of undecided on how I feel about his films. In some aspects, I really enjoyed the Kurosawa films we watched in class. In others, I really didn't.

Take Stray Dog for example. To begin with, the entire movie gets an incredibly uncomfortable vibe because of how sweaty everyone is. When people are sweating so profusely that they are literally drenched, it's just kind of icky. Count me out. The character of Murakami also bothered me throughout most of the movie. His obsession over what happened to the gun was understandable, but it got too extreme. He took everything as a personal attack and whenever something awful happened with his gun, he tried to take full responsibility. Generally, this would be an admirable quality. However, it was just overdone and became really obnoxious instead of respectable. My final problem with the film was the slow progression of the story. It wasn't easy to follow in the first place and when the plot is only creeping by, it doesn't help the situation. When a slow plot is added with something like the montage sequence of Murakami exploring the black market, the film is nearly too unbearable to watch. Definitely not my favorite.

Yojimbo and Ran were far more enjoyable for me to watch. There was more to the stories, characters I liked better, and more action than a couple of cops wandering the city. These films didn't try my patience hardly at all (a very nice break after Stray Dog) and I was able to follow and enjoy them. Overall, Kurosawa isn't exactly my favorite director, but I'm not going to try to say that he wasn't any good. I'm just really looking forward to starting our Altman unit now.

"Virgil, you weiner."

Ed Harris. What a stud. Way to save the world from nuclear war with a bizarre water-controlling alien species by being willing to sacrifice your life to disarm a nuclear warhead that some psychotic asshole of a Navy SEAL sent into the depths of the abyss. A gold star to you, my good sir.

Anyway, The Abyss was an interesting movie. I know that the word interesting doesn't necessarily denote something good, but I think it does in this case. Clearly I haven't quite made up my mind yet. In no way did I enjoy The Abyss as much as The Terminator, but it was still two hours and forty-five minutes of my life that were relatively well-spent. I was definitely surprised at how normal most of the movie was (normal being the operative word).

The Abyss tells the story of a pretty random group of people who work on an oil rig in the ocean. When a US submarine gets struck down by some unknown party (most people think it's "the Reds"), they get sent to rescue any survivors and check stuff out in general. The rig workers even get the help of some Navy SEALS (all except one end up dead or being total jerks). For most of the movie, they're legitimately trying to do what they're supposed to do without falling into the abyss and never seeing the light of day again. Obviously, they encounter some problems with this, but whatever. It's to be expected. I'm going to make a suggestion now. If you plan on ever seeing this movie, don't read on (even though I kind of already ruined part of it in the first paragraph). Heed this warning or pay the consequences.

I was totally surprised with how normal the movie was until maybe the last hour. It went from a moderately realistic plot line to one riddled with aliens. Ouch. However, considering that I was dealing with James Cameron, I was willing to put up with the large fluorescent amoebic monster/alien/machines to see where it all went. And go it did. To cut the introduction short, Ed Harris frolics (sinks) his way more than three miles down into the abyss to disarm a nuclear warhead. After he arrives and accomplishes his mission, he doesn't have enough air to get to the surface. Ed Harris (self-sacrificing and valiant as ever) accepts this doomed fate extremely calmly and sits back to enjoy the eerie and oddly-present iridescent lighting in the deep evil abyss. He prepares himself for death. BUT NO! Suddenly, a neon floaty alien comes to his rescue, takes him by the hand, and shows him their marvelous underwater city of alien/monster/machines. Once safely inside, they manipulate the water enough to give him some air to breathe so he doesn't actually die. To cut to the chase, up on land the aliens are threatening the entire world with a mile-high tsunami wave that promises to wipe out the entire population. Meanwhile, Ed Harris is underground and the aliens are explaining, through the magic of television, why they're doing what they are. Of course, they don't actually carry out the nefarious (but well-deserved) scheme because of Ed Harris's selflessness and honor. Go figure. Finally, they somehow float their entire city up to the surface of the water, rescuing the oil rig and freaking out everybody topside. Wow.

That's pretty much the movie right there. I apologize for the large amount of plot summary, but there really was no better way for me to explain myself. And before I forget, may I please talk about my absolute favorite part of the movie. Prepare yourself.

So...Ed Harris and his wife are stuck in a mini-submarine that is quickly filling up with water. They have one dive suit between them (Ed has it). If they don't do something soon, they're both going to die. They quickly decide that Ed should drag his wife's body through the frigid ocean back to the oil rig where (hopefully) they can revive her. Of course, things don't seem to go as planned. I should probably interject the fact that, at this point of the movie, my mom had come downstairs and was watching with me. I should probably also say that, earlier in the day, we had gone to a reception for a university in Hawaii that I might attend to be a marine biologist. Keep that in mind. In the movie, we have Ed Harris desperately trying to revive his dead frozen wife. He tries futilely to use the defibrillator, CPR, he even resorts to slapping her across the face and yelling "Goddammit, you bitch!...Fight! Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiight!" At this point, they show the aforementioned dead frozen wife, very blue in the face and very clearly dead (unfortately, she later came back to life). Then my mother turns to me and says "Oh, Katie, that could be you!" Thanks, mom. Much love.

Overall, The Abyss was not my favorite James Cameron film. However, I still enjoyed it greatly and am still willing to adventure further into Cameron films (although I may avoid Piranha Part II: The Spawning). I haven't decided whether or not this makes me a terrible person.

"I'm fairly alarmed here."

Jurassic Park...what a classic. It is an absolute visual delight that tells a lovely story of the imminent disasters caused by trying to control nature. There are also enormous dinosaurs that eat people.

This past Saturday, Whitney and I saw Jurassic Park at the Uptown theater at midnight. At first, I was iffy about the idea. However, considering the fact that (for once) I didn't have choir the next morning, I decided to go for it. I am so happy I made that decision. Overall, this was an excellent experience. The night started at the Uptown Diner where we indulged in some tasty malts and were slightly creeped out by our enthusiastic waiter. Definitely a positive start. After that, we made our way to the Uptown theater where, after standing in line for a bit, buying our tickets, getting popcorn, and me freaking about about a poster for Teeth, we made our way to the second row and settled in for the long haul.

What a good choice. No viewing of Jurassic Park could ever compare to that with a live audience. Especially if you consider the type of people who would actually go see Jurassic Park at midnight in Uptown. There was no doubt in my mind that the crowd would be excellent and I was not disappointed. At the introduction of each new character, there was much cheering and ruckus. When Wayne Knight was introduced as Dennis Nedry, a distinctly hateful murmur of "Newman..." arose from the audience. Although I was probably the person who laughed when B.D. Wong (who now is on Law and Order SVU) showed up, I didn't feel stupid at all. Fabulous.

I really wish that every movie-going experience could be as lovely and enjoyable as seeing Jurassic Park at midnight. Unfortunately, such is not the case....

"Television has brought murder back into the home - where it belongs."

A gold star to anybody who can answer the question of the day: what exactly did Hitchcock have against relationships? I don't really understand how somebody who seems to be rather jolly in a dark and suspenseful way can be so clearly bitter about something. Shall we examine the films we viewed in class.

We begin with The 39 Steps. This doesn't exactly support the idea of marriage. As we've discussed time and time again in class, almost none of the relationships in this film are happy. We have the crofter and his wife. He's an angry, religious little Scot and she's just there to make his food and clean the house. Why they're together in the first place nobody knows (clearly they would both be better off with someone else). During the film, Hitchcock exploits their bogus relationship to critique (in a way) the lies about marriage. Even at the end of the film, Hannay and his new found secret love aren't really happy, they're just kind of there. After experiencing such a ridiculous event, happy isn't really an option. It isn't all fun and games, kids. In real life, people are crabby and mean.

Moving on to Rear Window. Again, we've absolutely talked this to death but I'm content with digging the grave a little deeper. Jeff is completely set against marrying Lisa even though she is clearly perfect (and way too good for him as Stella points out repeatedly). Once again, Hitchcock has his protagonist shy away from the idea of marriage. Also, none of the relationships in the apartment complex are happy ones. Ms. Lonely Hearts is suicidal, Ms. Torso entertains man after man because she's bored, the composer sits alone banging away at the piano, Thorwald kills his wife, and the bizarre couple who sleep on the balcony are just bizarre. The only happy couple is the newlywed kids (and that is only because they're having sex like rabbits). Again, this entire movie is a sort of critique on people's awful relationships.

Finally, we have Vertigo. Definitely the most eerie of the films that we watched in class. We have the protagonist of the story in a relationship with a seemingly wonderful woman that he doesn't appreciate (could Hitchcock possibly be bitter about something?) We also have a clearly unhappy marriage, seeing as Elster hatches an ultra-elaborate plot to murder his adoring wife. At this point, we realize that Hitchcock clearly has had some bad relationship experiences. Not to mention an almost sick obsession, something that comes through clearly in this film. Nobody ever gets to be very happy in Hitchcock films.

Honestly, I don't know what Hitchcock could possibly have against relationships. They're not that bad - often they're actually enjoyable. It's possible that he had some bad experiences, maybe he had his heart broken one too many times. But it seems as though he is extremely bitter about this whole "love" thing. Maybe he's just a very crabby person.